The Five Pounds
The other day my husband proclaimed: “Well I did it. I’ve gained 11 pounds back! Now I just have five more pounds to go. I’d like to gain five more pounds.”
Super-moms and Super-women everywhere, together now: LOL!
Philippe had lost weight while we taught The Prana Cleanse™ (twice) and was super-happy it was re-appearing again.
“The five pounds.” How many times have I heard this from a Super-mom/Super-woman?
“If I could only lose five pounds, then I’d be happy.”
“It’s just these last five pounds—they are really distracting me. When I lose them, then I will do everything I’ve been wanting to do. I will be who I want to be.”
How many times has your weight or something to do with your body distracted you from following your heart and your dreams?
And what is REALLY going on here?
The fact that my sweet husband, bless his heart, was doing the “five pound thing” on the other end of the spectrum got me thinking—wondering, Super-mom style.
What would the world be like if everyone, right now, loved their body AS IT IS NOW. Not in five pounds, not in twenty pounds, not in a week or a month or when you fit into this or that.
Body discontent is pretty rampant and I’d like to help do something about it.
You can help.
Come together, Super-people, and share your experience on this topic. Be open and honest and fearless and let’s flush this out for once and all.
And have some perspective Super-women…some Super-men out there are wishing to weigh five pounds MORE.
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My two cents is that a regular yoga practice will shift your body image and overall attitude forever. I’ve seen it happen countless times and continue to enjoy seeing this transformation in my students on a daily basis.
I also believe that incorporating more raw, un-processed foods in your life will have the same effect. If you are putting processed, disconnected foods into your body, of course you will feel disconnected from your body and yourself. And disconnection from ourselves is what causes us to be distracted by “the five pounds”–which is actually an illusion—a metaphor for something else.
Philippe and I have made it super-easy for you to enjoy more live, unprocessed foods in your day-to-day life by opening The Prana Raw Café at 292 Centre Street, Newton Corner (3 doors down from Prana Power Newton—on the corner where the rug store used to be).
It doesn’t matter if you know what raw vegan is—the foods we serve at The Prana Café’ are so delicious (pizza, pasta, burgers, sandwiches, burritos, nachos, big salads, soups, juices, smoothies, the best desserts ever, and more) that you’ll hang out at The Prana Café’ (we have comfy couches-n-chairs, Starbucks-style as well as traditional tables and chairs) for the sheer delight of the taste of the food.
And you’ll feel so much better—physically, mentally, and emotionally.
And that, Super-people, is what it’s all about.
February 22nd, 2010 at 7:00 am
WOW….this topic was one that we were throwing around this weekend, my sister – in – law and I..(should I also mention that we giggled until 3AM in my living room and paid for it when morning came WAY too soon?)…
She and I have both dealt with disordered eating in our teens and 20′s for our own reasons…what we realized is that by JUST BEING NORMAL about food, body type etc. we can make the realities of our daughters very different. Now this all sounds simple, however, it is not…you have to watch your language around these little ears, you MUST cut the ridiculous inner dialogue that tells you that ‘you are/aren’t this, that or the other thing’ (none of it nice and nothing that you would ever say to someone that you love), and more important, you have to be willing to go to bat for your children when Grandma/Grandpa (just an example for any outside influence, no matter how “innocent” the critiques seem), or anyone else for that matter comments on their outward appearance. Being direct is key….I have learned to walk my walk and to be honest with my kids and sometimes that means telling them that something is Bull**** and that sometimes people make comments/ and say things for reasons that have nothing to do with you! Can it get uncomfortable? Sure….but that is a small price to pay for self esteem.
The best gift that we can give our children and ourselves is inner peace. That means so many different things to many different people…if you know yourself you will be fine…What I tell my guys (and this is a good one because it came from my Dad) is that as they travel through this life people will tell them who they “think” that they are…who should you listen to???? You must filter through the opinions of others and the ability to do so comes from standing firm and accepting who YOU are…flaws and all! Best advice that I have EVER gotten!
February 23rd, 2010 at 8:43 am
It is so true that this topic has caused needless suffering for so many of us – whether we physically appear to need to lose fat or not.
I love my mother dearly and believe that she did her very best raising three daughters. I don’t believe she realized that it did not matter how many times she told me how beautiful and healthy I was. I didn’t hear it. She didn’t understand why I didn’t listen to her, trust her. But I was listening. All I heard for many years was that SHE was fat. All I heard was my beautiful super mom asking her husband, her friends, even her daughters, if she looked fatter or thinner in this pant or that skirt. I observed my super mom go on a fat-free diet in the ’90s. I watched carefully as she lost and gained weight using various methods over the years. I listened carefully when she said, I would do _____ if I were thinner. I saw her happiness while losing, her misery while gaining.
I have no children, but I have a niece who will be two in May. She is one of my best friends and greatest teachers! One of my many dreams for her is that she will love herself, including her body, always. If all of the women in her life can love themselves to set a good example for her, then perhaps we could even end up loving ourselves, not just for my amazing little niece, but simply for ourselves!
Thank you for these beautiful reminders, Taylor! And thanks to Chrissy too!
P.S. We’re on the right track – my sister and I have done yoga in the presence of my niece. The other day she dragged her mom’s mat out of a closet and said, I wanna do downdog! We said, Go for it! How about a little Trikonasana while you’re at it? (Another one of her favorites…)
February 23rd, 2010 at 6:50 pm
UGH Marta!
I have friends who tear down their bodies right in front of their children….I never get angry with my friends except when they pick at their bellies, butts, point out cellulite..whatever….let’s be real..we ALL feel better about ourselves/appearance on certain days, but hey…they day marches on. You cannot teach children to love their bodies if you hate yours. I am 36…do I have jiggle? YUP! I have also housed and birthed 3 healthy kids….so really does it matter! Your body is the home of your soul (at this moment in time) if we treat our bodies with kindness, our children will learn to do the same.
February 23rd, 2010 at 11:43 pm
Yes, Sisters, I wholeheartedly agree, which is why this is one of the best quotes I’ve ever loved:
“My life is my message.”
-Mahatma Gandhi
Namaste!
Taylor
February 24th, 2010 at 9:33 pm
I wonder, Taylor, if you were aware that this is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week or it this post is just another synchronicity?
On the last five pounds … I found it’s helped to throw out the skinny jeans and just accept them. LOL. Beats all the energy and effort that went into staying five pounds underweight, for 15 years, a time in which my biggest accomplishment in life was being the skinniest person in the room.
During my last year of graduate school, I went on Prozac and over the next 18 months, I gained a good 15 pounds. I lost five pounds almost overnight when I went off the drug, but it seems I lost the ability to “diet” too, so the other 10 have just stayed with me.
I tried for a couple of years to lose them, but one day things shifted and I threw out my skinny jeans and bought new slouchy jeans. As Byron Katie says, when you argue with reality, you lose, but only 100% of the time. 
Yoga was helpful! They say yoga doesn’t give you the body you want, but rather teaches you to love the body you have. That seems to have been true for me. I’m happy with my body and haven’t given the extra five pounds a thought in many years.
That was my path (the easy one). For people who really want to release those “last five pounds,” a clean diet is the way to go. It’s almost impossible to release that weight otherwise because (according to one of my teachers…) the subtle fat layers protect the vital organs. Sometimes, the last five pounds (though it’s usually 10 or 15) are what’s keeping us alive. The more toxic the diet, the environment, etc. the more the body clings to those pounds, for dear life. Our bodies are very smart!
February 25th, 2010 at 6:31 am
Good for you Elizabeth….but did you lose the ability to diet or the need to control what went in and out of your body obsessively??? Dieting to be underweight is in fact anorexia(and it takes a strong amazing woman like yourself to be as open an honest about using medication because in many cases it IS helpful in the recovery from eating disorders)….it is funny…I was at my 12 year old daughter’s well visit yesterday. She is strong and happy with her body (and she can hit a softball like nobody’s business)…she got on the scale and I saw the numbers….after I had her I weighed exactly the same that she does today….that was with tears, struggle, obsessive behavior, starvation, over exercise and all of the other horrible things that go with anorexia….so yes, I weighed the same as a 12 year old girl after having a baby…looking back on photos I see how truly ill I looked… not a fun time. I have since also lost my ability to diet…and am so glad that I did before my daughters came to an age where they realized what Mommy was up to. Being unnaturally thin (or WAY underweight whether your food choices are healthy or not…hello orthorexia), and hating my body was not the best thing for myself or for my girls…I have wonderful women in my life who struggle still with anorexia or some type of disordered eating…they NEVER have any food in their house, don’t cook for their families, are on this cleanse or that (I cleanse too but not every darn WEEK:), and for WHAT??? Would I love to see them get help, sure, but you have to be willing to let go, and that is why ED’s are so pervasive….
February 25th, 2010 at 7:31 am
Hi Chrissy!
I am NOT about struggle. I maintained a weight on the low side of normal (but not clinically problematic) for many years after recovering from an ed because sadly, being thin had become constitutive of my identity, and I couldn’t give it up. I wasn’t trying to lose weight, and I was eating 3 meals a day, just not indulging, ever. Looking back, it was a lot of psychic effort! My friends were all starting businesses and families and I was busy staying thin. Not much of a life.
I don’t like to say anything good about prozac because I think these drugs are WAY overused and they mostly do more harm than good. I think they’re used to treat chronic conditions that can be treated with lifestyle changes. Maybe they are useful for acute interventions, I don’t know. I’m sure I would have gained the 10 lbs eventually after grad school as I started to find my identity in work and other things. Funnily enough, I didn’t go off it because of the weight gain, I went off it because it made me lose my edge. At least during those years of not accomplishing much I was in a lot of pain, pain that didn’t let me give up, pain that led me to constantly want to learn new things, etc. It was a couple years after going off it before I shed a tear at a movie (that’s pretty scary).
I don’t like the word diet. But after I was off the drug a few months, I did start to re-experience feelings of anxiety and I’d think, “I should really get back to –lbs.” But then as soon as I’d try to skip a meal, I’d realize, “how ridiculous.” As I said, it’s a lot of psychic effort to maintain a weight below your biological setpoint, and I didn’t have the energy available. I was busy with more important things. I also think it takes a lot of self-hatred to fuel an eating disorder and I had none of that left. Which is why I’m absolutely positive that even without the prozac intervention (which I was prescribed for anxiety/depression not anorexia) I would have gained the weight eventually anyway.
February 25th, 2010 at 10:04 am
That is such awesome news Elizabeth!
I TOTALLY agree that meds are WAY overused, but they can be life saving in acute cases…I feel that people stay on meds FAR too long…18 months should be the norm…however it seems like 18 years is! I admire your bravery because most people would NEVER say that they had even ever swallowed a Prozac (which I did after daughter 1 for a few months and it did help me move into a better place food wise)! I too have anxiety but I have NEVER viewed it as a curse…(plus I SWEAR that a lot of Italians are wired for it anyway…well at least in my family..OH I can hear the outrage in blog world LOL)…it is comforting to know what anxiety is (and isn’t), and with that knowledge I have been able to say to myself “Yes this is what it is but it could have been WAYYYYY worse”. When I feel myself getting caught up in worries/ fears/ etc. I too remind myself that my worries are unfounded, and that I like me for who I am anxiety and all!
I was just astounded by your post(in a good way because dizamn girl..you rock) because not many people are as honest or as self aware as you are….and I get the whole “being skinny is who I am thing”…that is the hardest hurdle in treating ED’s….they make you feel “safe”…of course that is so far from true, however for people with anxiety ed’s can be a way to control life when all else fails….
I too have gained some healthy weight back and am so much stronger..I work out because it makes me feel good, I eat well because it makes my body and brain happy and I chill out because frankly I am no fun when I am wound too tightly…and being fun is REALLY who I am…skinny or not!
February 25th, 2010 at 8:39 pm
I think the issue is how you feel, not how you look.
When you eat poorly and get little exercise, you do feel crappy and you don’t look so well either. In this instance, it’s nearly impossible to “will” yourself into liking how you look, because you’re not feeling so hot either.
I started going to Prana Power Yoga right after I realized my divorce was going to trial. It was so contentious (and I was so poor) but I thought I would lose my mind if I didn’t do something. So I started going and as Taylor advises, I did start to feel better. Similarly, I heard Taylor talk about the opening of her raw food restaurant. Out of curiousity I searched for information on a raw food lifestyle on the Internet and there is a lot there. I was fascinated. Now I don’t eat all raw food, but I do eat a lot more than I did, and I do feel so much better physically and about myself. I’d like to do more, but for now, I do “my best” each day and try to be happy about what I eat — and try not to eat things that aren’t really food.
If you think about what is advertised for food on television, what people are being served in most restaurants, it is really scary, and it’s no wonder that people don’t feel good about themselves. What eating more raw food has taught me is to recognized when I’m consuming food that is more processed — and there is a range — of barely processed foods (like cooked vegetables) to extremely processed, really, non-foods. Many, many people eat a “meal” of all processed foods, and I do contend that this is the main reason why people don’t feel good and don’t like their bodies.
My other experience with this is having grown up with persistent low blood sugar problems — for years I felt rather nauseous most of the time and sweaty — and when the symptoms were exacerbated — I actually felt sick and passed out — falling hard. All from eating poorly. When I was a kid I ate what my mother served me — she cooked almost always from “scratch” but again used a lot of flour and sugar, and served hardly any fresh vegetables, which she didn’t like.
So, in a way we have become victims of the food industry, our acculturation around food, etc., etc., etc.
Here’s a parting thought: If most people suffer from the same problem, it’s probably not personal. Kathy
February 26th, 2010 at 7:33 am
True…very true Kathy….I feel blessed to have grown up in an Italian family. We NEVER ate processed food. If it wasn’t prepared at home and purchased either at the farmers market or grown in Nonna’s very own garden it did not make it to the table. All of that fake food that my friends were used to was a rare treat….we just never wanted that stuff because it wasn’t forbidden, it was just not what we were used to. As a family we still gather around the table and my kids know what every fruit or veggie looks like (they don’t like em all but hey…who does?). All of the talk of “exotic fruit/veggies” makes me wonder…they have been there all along….I love that my children’s friends want me to show them how to open a pomegranate or that they have never tried starfruit but now know that it tastes similar to grapes…that is cool stuff…
February 26th, 2010 at 11:34 pm
I love all this Super-dialogue, Super-people, about an issue that needs to be talked about and to be out in the open. For too long it’s been in the dark.
My hope is that Super-people everywhere free themselves of the prisons of negative body images and self images and empower themselves through their own choices to feel the best ever, not trying to be perfect, since that doesn’t exist, but instead owning their resposibility to do the best they can do feel good, moment to moment. Whatever that takes–and this is a personal answer.
It’s what we do most of the time that matters and actually, what we are thinking when we eat is more important than what we are consuming.
A internationally well-known nutritionist who’s been raw for 45 years (he’s 80!) called me and wanted to do a talk at The Prana Cafe’. It was just a few days before he wanted to speak, and so we ultimately decided instead to connect at the cafe’ and plan for another speaking engagement in the next few months when we have more time to get the word out.
His name is Fred Bisci and Philippe and I had dinner with him and his colleagues last night at the Cafe’ and he was an absolute love–absolutely delightful.
This guys is 80 years old and literally looks about 50, if that. He has so much PRANA and such a zest for life and was a pleasure to hang out with for a few hours. He sleeps 2-4 hours a night and runs marathons. He’s run 18 so far.
We definitely resonated with him and his message of balance and moderation, and talked about how some on the raw path (and any path) are too extreme. And even raw, taken to the extreme, is not healthy or balanced.
Fred pretty much summed it up (and made me laugh) when he said “When someone spends way too much time thinking about whether they should eat 8 almonds or 9 almonds, there’s a problem.”
LOL!
We talked a lot about balance and abundance and non restriction and about the fact that we have many friends who are not raw and/or who eat the SAD–or worse–but we love their energy and who they are and the food is such a non-issue.
And then there are raw vegans who are wound so tightly and so obsessive that it’s painful to be around them.
So as always, Super-people, it all depends.
Being 100% raw vegan isn’t “good” and eating the SAD “bad,” but it is a fact that what we put into our bodies does affect our energy and our life force and our mood, and so it’s fun and nice to have cutting edge information and choose to use it when we want to–or not.
And not to judge others based upon their choices.
Judgment is the dark side and zaps creative divine energy.
On a totally unrelated and humorous note, I was informed by my 12-year-old daughter that her friends don’t know what “the dark side” is, and could I please not write on her Facebook wall anymore?
HUGE LOL!
Namaste!
Taylor
February 27th, 2010 at 10:47 pm
Welcome to all of our 2010 Prana Power Yoga Teacher Trainees who were just introduced to the site–many of whom chose this article on which to write a response for the short paper assignment.
Namaste!
Taylor
February 28th, 2010 at 9:17 am
LOL…no Mom’s on Facebook???
Where have I heard that before?
I could not agree more about not minding what others choose to fuel their bodies on any given day. I think that the reason that some “100 % Raw ” folks are viewed as extreme is because so many are….it is hard when people use the words “always”, “never” etc. when talking about food or anything else in life….sometimes it is hard to hear all of the noise. I get feeling passionate about a subject, however there has to be a happy medium. Sleeping 2 – 4 hours a night does not sound like that to me, but hey…that’s just me…if it works for this guy, that rocks. There is much thought and opinion about what is healthy and what isn’t….I think that being kind both to yourself and to others around you will lead you to the answers that are truly correct for your body.
March 3rd, 2010 at 12:22 pm
5 pounds.
First, I’m a man. Yay. Second, I’m a small man for American averages – I’m 5’7″ and weigh about 146-150 depending. Also, I rarely, if ever, check my weight – I don’t own a scale and frankly, don’t really care about the number. BUT, I’ve always wanted to weigh more. I played high school sports, specifically football and weight and weighing more were looked at as positive things. I tried to eat pb sandwiches and eggs late at nite to gain weight, but my metabolism and level of activity were too high. So, I would lie about my weight, saying that I weighed more. Haha, I can’t imagine a woman that would do that.
I accept that my body is my body and I appreciate it as is and truly I’m not (and never really have been) overly concerned. In our society the focus is definitely on women’s figures and weights, but there are pressures as a man.
Apart from my weight, pretty much every woman in my life (mother, sister, friends, and girlfriends) have had body image/weight issues. I have always worked so hard to reassure them that they are beautiful as they are and that men find it much more attractive when a women eats food rather then being stick thin. This has been and is an uphill battle because of, primarily, the media. I encourage all men to compliment all the women in their lives for their beauty – and I encourage all women to accept those compliments and let those words become a part of you as you realize how beautiful you are – AS YOU ARE
March 3rd, 2010 at 3:35 pm
OK!
We all love Tony! What a nice, fresh, male perspective! Whoever raised you did it well, and I hope that the lessons that I am teaching my little man sink in the way they have for you:)!
My Dad is built the same…. we are small people….as is everyone in our Italian family! This might be why my 12 year old daughter is just about my height and wears the same shoe size that I do! The great thing about that? She loves her body even though she is going to tower over her Mama some day very soon!
March 4th, 2010 at 12:16 pm
Taylor, when are you going to open a Prana Cafe in New York?! I’ve been playing around with raw/vegan for a few months now and am loving it. Tell me a New York outpost of the Prana Cafe is in the works?!