“A grand adventure is about to begin.”
Winnie the Pooh
“A grand adventure is about to begin.”
Winnie the Pooh
“Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.”
“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”
I got this sweet note from a reader while I was pregnant with the Twins:
I am amazed at how you have stayed the amazing Super-mom while being pregnant with your twins; it is possible for anyone right? Can you please write about this?”
First of all, I’ve always marveled at how EASY pregnancy is—when someone ELSE is pregnant.
LOL, but it’s true.
A student of mine is now 22 weeks pregnant and I swear, she just told me she was pregnant yesterday.
It’s flown by so fast!
But when it’s you who’s carrying that little baby(s), it can be a long road, especially if you have nausea, vomiting, exhaustion, varicose veins, insomnia and any of the other difficult side effects that can accompany the miracle of creating life.
I personally get this weird “itchy” thing at night. My upper arms itch so intensely that I scratch in my sleep till my arms bleed. I googled it and read that a lot of people get this in relation to the seasons and hormones. Literally the only thing that helps—the ONLY thing—is ice packs. So while pregnant, I sleep with ice packs on my upper arms. Or I don’t sleep at all.
I also get this super-uncomfortable/awful “chill” thing. Only my mother-in-law and sister-in-law seem to understand this one (no midwife I’ve asked has ever heard of it), and maybe they’re just trying to make me feel better (LOL), but it goes like this. When I get in bed to go to sleep, I get this subtle but painful “chill” going through my body about ever 15 seconds. EVERY FIFTEEEN SECONDS! Try sleeping with that happenin. It ain’t gonna happen, Sister. And it’s so incredibly uncomfortable to boot.
But you know what? It’s all worth it. So worth it that I did it five times.
How to continue on while so many symptoms (and emotions—helllooooowwww hormones) are pervading your being?
It’s all about the power of the focus of your mind.
This is your yoga.
Where are you focusing your mind?
Where are you looking?
What’s your drishti? (A Sanskrit word that means “gaze or point of focus”)
Because Girl, if you’re walking down “I feel sorry for myself street,” it’s gonna be a loooonnnnng 10 months.
So what I learned, slowly but surely, through many months of many pregnancies, is to focus on the good. Moment to moment.
And to continue to “live.”
To take the necessary precautions for safety (no skydiving my Sisters!), but to continue to be “you.”
To remember who you are.
Throughout the pregnancy.
And to remember what it’s all for.
I remember when I was pregnant with Madison (now 13), and feeling so sick, so nauseous, throwing up 20 times a day, and almost nightly lying down on the floor and just sobbing from the overall discomfort of it all.
Then my husband’s assistant gave us a little white onesie set. This was super early on Supermoms, at like 7 weeks pregnant.
I stopped in my tracks, looked at that little white onesie set, and said to myself “Oh, yeah, THIS is why I feel this way. I’m going to have a little baby.”
I gazed at that white onesie set as often as I could, remembering what it was all for.
So that was my yoga, during my 5 pregnancies, remembering who I am and remembering what I was doing—the most miraculous thing on the planet: creating life.
“By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.”
“Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but are always perfect for you.”
“Thoughts fueled with love cannot miss their mark.”
“In my life there is an infinite supply of love, it is in exhastable, I can never use all of it in this lifetime so I don’t have to be sparing with it!”
“The greatest gift that you could ever give to another is your own happiness, for when you are in a state of joy, happiness, or appreciation, you are fully connected to the Stream of pure, positive Source Energy that is truly who you are. And when you are in that state of connection, anything or anyone that you are holding as your object of attention benefits from your attention.”
“Your mind is a powerful magnet that will attract to you the things you identify yourself with.”
Super-Mom Betsy Parsons:
I expected motherhood to change me. How could it not? Everything was new. But what I didn’t expect was that motherhood would strip me bare – drop me to rock bottom – force me to face that I had lost myself – demand that I pick up the shattered bits of me and piece myself back together. It was all at once brutal and gratifying. I am grateful for all of it. I have learned who I am and how great my support system is. I learned how absolutely wonderful my husband is, what a fantastic dad he is, and what a loving and supportive family surround us. It’s not just me who is a super mom. It’s my husband, my mom and dad, and my mother and father-in-law who make up this super family. Each one of us plays an important role. Life is a tremendous gift, and we were all starkly reminded of that during the first six weeks of my daughter’s life. We almost lost her. The first six weeks of her life were spent in the NICU. She was a full term baby but a very sick one. After she came home, every milestone was carefully watched. She thrived. And I almost missed it because I was worried about what could be wrong. It was 9 months later when I started to splinter apart. She was walking and I was cracking – emotions needed to be expressed. I needed to feel again. Not surprising, but I hadn’t been taking care of myself. I was just trying to make it through a minute, then an hour, and a full day. I wasn’t taking care of myself. I wasn’t sleeping well. I was sleepwalking. I rationalized that all of this was well within a first-time mom response (ha!). Eventually, I was diagnosed with PTSD and got help. I began to piece myself back together. It took another full year for me to hear the stirrings of my voice. It’s been over two years, and just recently I realized that I am whole again. I experienced such joy in finding myself. I had really missed me! But losing myself and finding an improved version had taken hold – makes me so grateful for the journey. It has allowed me freedom to be myself, to slow down and enjoy the moments of motherhood, to rely on my family to play significant roles raising my daughter, to trust, and to embrace the unexpected. It’s often what I need most! I’m so thankful for my super family – including my husband who is embracing his role as stay-at-home dad! Collectively, we’re a super team with a super daughter.