“A grand adventure is about to begin.”
Winnie the Pooh
“A grand adventure is about to begin.”
Winnie the Pooh
“Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.”
“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”
I got this sweet note from a reader while I was pregnant with the Twins:
I am amazed at how you have stayed the amazing Super-mom while being pregnant with your twins; it is possible for anyone right? Can you please write about this?”
First of all, I’ve always marveled at how EASY pregnancy is—when someone ELSE is pregnant.
LOL, but it’s true.
A student of mine is now 22 weeks pregnant and I swear, she just told me she was pregnant yesterday.
It’s flown by so fast!
But when it’s you who’s carrying that little baby(s), it can be a long road, especially if you have nausea, vomiting, exhaustion, varicose veins, insomnia and any of the other difficult side effects that can accompany the miracle of creating life.
I personally get this weird “itchy” thing at night. My upper arms itch so intensely that I scratch in my sleep till my arms bleed. I googled it and read that a lot of people get this in relation to the seasons and hormones. Literally the only thing that helps—the ONLY thing—is ice packs. So while pregnant, I sleep with ice packs on my upper arms. Or I don’t sleep at all.
I also get this super-uncomfortable/awful “chill” thing. Only my mother-in-law and sister-in-law seem to understand this one (no midwife I’ve asked has ever heard of it), and maybe they’re just trying to make me feel better (LOL), but it goes like this. When I get in bed to go to sleep, I get this subtle but painful “chill” going through my body about ever 15 seconds. EVERY FIFTEEEN SECONDS! Try sleeping with that happenin. It ain’t gonna happen, Sister. And it’s so incredibly uncomfortable to boot.
But you know what? It’s all worth it. So worth it that I did it five times.
How to continue on while so many symptoms (and emotions—helllooooowwww hormones) are pervading your being?
It’s all about the power of the focus of your mind.
This is your yoga.
Where are you focusing your mind?
Where are you looking?
What’s your drishti? (A Sanskrit word that means “gaze or point of focus”)
Because Girl, if you’re walking down “I feel sorry for myself street,” it’s gonna be a loooonnnnng 10 months.
So what I learned, slowly but surely, through many months of many pregnancies, is to focus on the good. Moment to moment.
And to continue to “live.”
To take the necessary precautions for safety (no skydiving my Sisters!), but to continue to be “you.”
To remember who you are.
Throughout the pregnancy.
And to remember what it’s all for.
I remember when I was pregnant with Madison (now 13), and feeling so sick, so nauseous, throwing up 20 times a day, and almost nightly lying down on the floor and just sobbing from the overall discomfort of it all.
Then my husband’s assistant gave us a little white onesie set. This was super early on Supermoms, at like 7 weeks pregnant.
I stopped in my tracks, looked at that little white onesie set, and said to myself “Oh, yeah, THIS is why I feel this way. I’m going to have a little baby.”
I gazed at that white onesie set as often as I could, remembering what it was all for.
So that was my yoga, during my 5 pregnancies, remembering who I am and remembering what I was doing—the most miraculous thing on the planet: creating life.
“By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.”
“Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but are always perfect for you.”
“Thoughts fueled with love cannot miss their mark.”
“In my life there is an infinite supply of love, it is in exhastable, I can never use all of it in this lifetime so I don’t have to be sparing with it!”
“The greatest gift that you could ever give to another is your own happiness, for when you are in a state of joy, happiness, or appreciation, you are fully connected to the Stream of pure, positive Source Energy that is truly who you are. And when you are in that state of connection, anything or anyone that you are holding as your object of attention benefits from your attention.”
“Your mind is a powerful magnet that will attract to you the things you identify yourself with.”
“Every day is a great day, some days are better than others” my uncle said to me last week. Becoming a mother was one of those exceptionally “great” days. Iris’s first night I could hardly sleep. My body buzzed with adrenaline. This joy carried me through the first few weeks. I was surprised at my resilience, running on no sleep and little food. I was like the energizer bunny; I just kept going and going, fueled by love for my sweet, soft, cuddly newborn.
Fast-forward 7 months and although the novelty of having a newborn has slightly dulled (we are very much into a routine at this point), I still find myself continuously amazed. So, here we are on a Sunday night in January. Iris has been sleeping since 7pm. At around 10:00, I hear her stirring and crying. When I enter her room I hear gurgling, sniffling and coughing. It occurs to me that Iris might have her first cold (her father has had a cold for a week at this point and it seemed inevitable that she caught it). I nurse her and rock her but she is still upset, which is rare (she is normally a very happy baby). So, I decide to bring her downstairs. We snuggle on the couch and I rock her back and forth on my knees for an hour or so. When I bring her back to bed, she falls right to sleep, yes!
The next morning, as I wipe dried snot from her face (chisel it off more like). I have a feeling the next few days will be challenging, especially since I am sick as well! Monday night did not disappoint. At 3:00 in the morning I found myself in the rocking chair (for the fifth time that night), rocking, nursing, soothing, rocking, nursing, soothing, repeat, my eyes half open with a pounding headache. I thought to myself “this is what makes mothers so special”. Because even with no sleep, feeling like I’d been trampled by elephants, I still had the capacity to care for and nurture Iris. In my rocking chair meditation, I could appreciate that mothers are very special people (fathers are too but this is about mom), because as soon as you become a mother (however that may be), there is a transcendence that takes place. The person who immerges is the best version of you. You are a person with boundless energy, exploding love, you are “mommy” and everyone knows there is no substitute for “mommy”.